five things I miss about my childhood

Some
days
are
meant
to
be
rem
ember
ed
Those days we rise above the stars
So I'll go the distance this time
Seeing more the higher I climb
That the more I believe
All the more that this dream will be mine
If I could reach higher
Just for one moment touch the sky
From that one moment in my life
I'm gonna be stronger
Know that I've tried my very best
I'd put my spirit to the test
If I could reach
(lyrics by Gloria Estefan)

My First Meme

Rules : Remove the blog at #1 from the following list and bump every one up one place; add your blog's name in the #5 spot; link to each of the other blogs.
1. More Than My Luggage
2. Modigli
3. Babbling Brooke
4. Cannot Be Trusted
5. Every Passing Moment

The top five things I miss about my childhood are:

1. Playing with my Barbie dolls. Sometimes it would be a big group of us or just my sister and I and one time I remember it being me and 2 guys. They played the Ken part. Often times the best was when I played Barbies on my own. I just couldn't understand how some of my friends sweetened their voice so it sounded like a 2 year old and yet they are suppose to be playing a grown-up Barbie. I used my regular voice and I wasn't going to tell them how to play :) still kinda annoying.

2. I miss my ballet & tap dancing classes. Tap class was my favorite. I still remember getting ready backstage, my mom adjusting my costume and hair and I seriously do not remember being nervous. I remember standing in the stairwell with my group and looking at the stage waiting for our turn and not being nervous! That surprises me. One particular day, the finale song was performed by one of the ballet instructors and she sang "the sun will come out tomorrow" from Annie. All us little dancers where spread through out the aisles as she did her number. It was great. Later on in my life (6/7/8th grade) I used my talents of choregraphy for many dance routines performed in school :)

3. Summer days of just sitting in front of my house; talking, laughing, playing jump rope, frozen tag, bike riding down the street. With those banana seats we'd manage to get 4 of us in one bike! I had this one friend who had the best sense of humor. I still remember one thing she said when this guy 2 houses down asked her "can you watch my bike?" (he was stepping in the house) and she said "why, what does it do, tricks?" It made me laugh so much and the seriousness in her face, loved it. She was the funniest. We also discovered lipton tea together (the hot one) and we'd make it at night and it was so delicious. I have tried to make it taste the way it did back then but I have failed.

4. Playing kickball and dodgeball. I was the loud one (shocking huh?) and had a mean kick. Our version of dodgeball was played by kicking the ball (usually it's thrown). I liked seeing my friends try to dodge the ball. We had a lot of Boys vs Girls kickball games and we girls won many times but yes the boys had their share as well. We'll call it even :)

5. My trips to Mexico. We'd go for a couple of months. It was a road trip and I looked forward to McDonald's big breakfast, yummy. Sometimes out of nowhere some spanish song comes to mind and I wonder where I heard it and it turns out, it was the one blasting from the radio on our trips years back "no tengo dinero ni nada que dar, lo unico que tengo es amor para dar" I remember the nights in Mexico, of getting a big group of kids and all of us holding hands and playing mexico's version of ring-around-the-rosey or other games that brought us all together. And the stars in Mexico, AMAZING.

One of my earliest memories was of my dad trying to pick me up and me putting up a fight. My parents told me that I hated when someone would try to carry me, I wouldn't allow it! I wonder what that means?

I had so much fun with the meme, thanks Jacob!

Now I pass it on to five friends:
1. Transience (i know you don't normally do these but I can't make this list without including my 1st sweet blog friend :)
2. Mermaid
3. DeeM
4. Stella
5. Mystique
6. Gulnaz
7. Venus

ok I'll stop! :) look forward to reading your answers if you choose to participate.

an affair to remember

I don't know why this film came to mind when I was talking about my situation at the time. My birthday had passed and the one person who I was hoping would remember, didn't. Trying to remain optimistic, I thought that maybe there was some misunderstanding; an undelivered email or text to explain this and as I was talking about it I had said, what if this is like this film of the couple agreeing to meet at the top of the Empire State Building but who never do because of an unfortunate accident? I couldn't think of the name of the film but my friend knew it and in the same week surprised me with the video and I watched it over the weekend.

As it turns out, I had never seen the film. I only knew the story behind it. You can't be a romantic at heart and not know it :) Two people meet and have a strong connection but are engaged to other people. They decide to meet on top of the Empire State Building six months later, after they end their current relationships and if one doesn't show up they agree to leave it as is. While watching the film, I couldn't believe how similar their feelings resonated with mine. They had a sweet and pure relationship. As the movie progressed and the accident occurred and Nick waited sadly on top of the Empire State Building while Terry was fighting for her life, I was worried, I didn't know if they'd end up together and I was hoping they would, as if their fate would also be mine as well. (I was in a vulnerable place at the time) The point is that it brought me to this beautiful, heartwarming film and it's now part of my dvd collection.
It also gave me a great idea.

July 1st, 5pm (this is the day/time they had decided to meet) this friday
One day I will make my way to New York and go up there with my camera and discreetly watch for any other romantic souls waiting to meet up there. Life does imitate film sometimes. Or I wonder if I'd find someone else like me with the same idea? Under the same circumstances I would do the same thing. And if they didn't show up, it better be because they were in an
accident!! ha ha! But nowadays we have cellphones so that kills it all.

These pictures were taken from the top of the Duomo in Florence.
You can always meet here.
It was quite a hike going up these steps, 463 to be exact!
Hopefully, 463 reasons why you love the person you are meeting up there!!
I like this spot right here.

i believe i can fly

"i believe i can touch the sky
i think about it every night and day"

It was a Sunday afternoon. We were in our usual positions. I was working on homework facing the front entrance and he was sitting down, legs on the desk facing the security cameras with eyes closed. Yes, Sox park was definitely in good hands. It was just another work day, although for me it never felt like work, it felt more like I was getting paid to hang out with a good friend. John, a retired cop and I got along so well. People use to like to watch us interact because we seemed like brother & sister or as one lady said "husband & wife". That description was probably because of our playful nagging or bossing around.

On this day, "I believe I can fly" began playing on the radio and it seemed to inspire him, to move him enough to take some moments from his careful "camera screening" and start singing. He took center stage, (climbed the long oval reception desk) paying no mind to whatever he was stepping on, flapping his arms like a bird while walking to the edge of the desk, which is a little higher (meanwhile i was just laughing, it was great!!) and after warming up his wings, he took flight, yes he got about .00002 seconds air time and landed badly on one ankle! I was laughing so hard!! Yes, a small injury for his believe that he could fly. A big honor knowing that there was someone who would go to silly extremes to make me laugh!

For his enjoyment, he once punched holes in my styrofoam coffee cup and it took me awhile to notice, I thought I was just being clumsy and when I finally discovered his prank ,wow did he get a kick out of it, as did I! Before I left this job, this lady told me that he was talking about how he was going to miss me. I wasn't planning on leaving yet but I guess he figured I would since I had finished school and had gotten a full-time job. Hearing it really touched me. And the last day I worked with him, I wasn't aware it would be my last and I'm glad I didn't because it was a day just like any other. Ordinary. Perfect.
I miss those moments with him. Silence with him was golden. Although rare since I loved to talk to him and he loved to listen. I miss him.
"Some people leave footprints in our hearts and we are never the same."

And I remember him when I listen to this song or whenever I need a reason to smile.

"spread my wings and fly away
i believe i can soar
i see me running through that open door

i believe i can fly"

these hands, these arms

3 seconds, only 3 seconds

why do people give such quick hugs
why do they barely touch you and then pull away
what is the rush

why do they only come on birthdays or holidays
or from the one you love
i have gone a long time without a hug
and when one is given, it's usually a must
and it doesn't last long

i want a real hug
one that holds me for minutes
and holds me real close

i want to listen to the rhythm of your heart
and find familiarity with the song

i want it to silence our voice
and let our hands do the talking

i want to rest my head in your shoulders
and feel the comfort of your weight

i want enough time to drink in your scent
so that it stays with me long after you've left

i want to lose my fingers inside your hair
and have our bodies form a single silhouette

i want to be near to your heart physically
and find release in knowing that it's not beyond my reach

i want enough time to close my eyes and smile
to linger sweetly in this embrace

i want a real hug
isn't that why we have
these hands, these arms

i am slowly falling

I ran into these words in such an unlikely place and it made me curious as to who would have put it there and why. I like finding words unexpectedly and this spoke volumes for me at the time because I was right in the middle of it. In my doubts, maybe the world was reassuring me that it was true. I was,
I am slowing down and falling in love again.

I asked my beautiful friend to pose in front of it and she graciously obliged. She tried to convey this feeling of falling in love but instead we just had fun with it! She did a great job! :)











Ironically (I'm not kidding) the words were taken down a few months later!
And I was still falling, but not in love, I was falling s l o w ly
from the effects of unrequited love.

The words gone. The feelings not easily erased.

i am slowing down.
i am slowly falling down

am I a lover or a fighter?

i am a lover
but for you

if you were the prize i would gain
and we decided this was the best way
i would fight'er
              fight h er
i would fight --> her


the morning of the day
i would challenge fate
with armour and sword at hand
i would walk to the center
my motivation
i want to live in your eyes
my destination
i want to be by your side

each stroke i'd make infused with love
and i don't know if it would be enough
and i don't want to hurt anyone
but i don't want to hurt us

i would fight her
i would fence my way into your arms

but only if i knew there was a part of you
that was betting on my win
and the anxiety you'd feel as you watched
were followed by a few whispers to your heart
for me

otherwise, i don't want to be a keeper
of someone that would always elude me
i don't want to be a thief of hearts

i would fight her
and would i meet victory?
that is all up to destiny

venice, my date

As I stepped out of the train station and into the city, my first glimpse of Venice left me speechless! I was WOWed! This area was crowded with people walking in every direction but among those not moving were the newcomers like myself who had stopped to take it all in. I felt like I had stepped into a time travel machine and my destination was some fairytale land found only in a book. It was AMAZING. With all the luggage I had to carry, I didn't have a hand free to take a picture of this moment and I'm glad I didn't because such moments like this shouldn't be captured in a photograph. They would always fail to live up to the magic that I felt in that instant. Memory is the best safekeeper.



I'm sure when I had first looked at Venice I gazed at her with my I'm falling in love eyes. I had. Venice excudes romance, so either you bring love with you to make the experience more spectacular or she becomes your lover. It was settled, Venice was my date and I was enamored to be in such exquisite company. I couldn't resist her colorful personality, brilliant energy and fascinating history. The affair rendered my heart dizzy. No love is perfect and one minor issue was that I couldn't walk around with a cup of coffee!! (venice cafe's don't have to-go cups). Good news, one day I managed to do so and therefore was satisfied.

Every single place, every spot, curb, staircase was a place to get lost, rendezvous with your significant other and talk about forever or where to go for lunch. The air carried languages from all over the world, all intermingled to form one huge, well deserved compliment to Venice for making us feel welcomed.





Piazza San Marco shined at night with three orchestra bands playing music as the crowd walked from one to the other. Every performance was followed by a generous applause. Couples were seen giving each other roses, hugs and kisses with lovely thoughts. Smiles were part of the evening attire. Everyone was basking in Romance.



Leaving Venice. I had to get up in the brisk of dawn, walk a lonely, quiet passageway and hop on a boat. When do you get to do something like that? It felt exciting, like I was on a mission. Partly I was, my mission being to return back home. It was such an abrupt way to say good-bye to Venice but as we steered away I kept my eyes fixated on all of Venice, taking it all in one last time in efforts to engrave every last detail in my memory and whispering in my mind parting is such sweet sorrow.









Fortunately, distance makes the heart grow fonder.

swaying in the wind

You are now in St. Thomas, U.S. Virgin Islands, July 2000.

When I would listen to "Angel" by Sarah McLachlan my mind would always wander to a beautiful ocean front and I'd imagine myself lying in a hammock immersed in the waves crashing sounds, watching the clouds travel the sky forming brilliant images while I swayed in the wind with my thoughts. The song longs for peace and so did I and I guess that was why the setting was so appropriate.

You can imagine my excitement when I discovered the resort I was staying in had hammocks on the beach!!! I seriously didn't expect it since none of my other trips had this luxury. Anyhow, I hopped on the hammock (tricky at first) and I lay down, relaxed and let the wind rock me to oblivion.

(this was my view from above)



Thankfully I also had my headphones and happen to be carrying Sarah's cd, so I played the song. The music enhanced the moment and I absorbed the scent, sounds, colors, the rythmn of it all. It felt soooooooo good!

"Spend all your time waiting
for that second chance
for a break that would make
it okay there's always one reason
to feel not good enough
and it's hard at the end of the day
I need some distraction
oh beautiful release
memory seeps from my veins
let me be empty and weightless
and maybe I'll find some peace tonight

in the arms of an angel
fly away from here
from this dark cold hotel room
and the endlessness that you fear
you are pulled from the wreckage
of your silent reverie
you're in the arms of the angel
may you find some comfort there"

"Angel" lyrics by Sarah McLachlan

At that time I hadn't met the person who now makes special appearances in my daydreams when I listen to this song. So to you, on those days when you are feeling a little lost, this could be one of the places you might be found ;)

"You see the 2 beach chairs over there?



it's a perfect spot for you and I. Why don't you take a seat and I'll bring us some margaritas or whatever you'd like." "Yes, I know you'd rather get to know the island and walk around and discover it's mystery but we can do that after we relax, no?" You smiled and took my hand and we walked together towards the ocean.

a girl can dream and i do ;)

I would like my roses to see you

"Won't you come into the garden?
I would like my roses to see you"
Richard Brinsley Sheridan

"Hurry up and take pictures of the roses before the wind throws their petals off. They look beautiful right now!" That was what my mother told me this weekend. I thought it was adorable how important it was for her that I photograph them. The pictures I include are not those I took recently (haven’t finished the roll, plus I’m sure you'll notice the date) but I had so many from past years that I wanted to share. I tried removing the date but I couldn't figure it out and my patience and time ran out. I like to think that the date is the d.o.l (date of life) of the flowers..hehe! Anyhow, this proves how devoted I have been in photographing my Mom's flowers for many years.
Mami, you're just as beautiful as the flowers.



"If I had a rose for every time I thought of you, I'd be picking roses for a lifetime."
Swedish Proverb



"Plant your own garden and decorate your own soul, instead of waiting for someone to bring you flowers."
Veronica A. Shoffstall









"The rose speaks of love silently, in a language known only to the heart."
unknown



"To know someone with whom you can feel there is understanding in spite of distances or thoughts unexpressed...
that can make this life a garden..."
Goethe




"There can be no other occupation like gardening in which, if you were to creep up behind someone at their work, you would find them smiling."
Mirabel Osler